its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Randomize