I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
