i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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