yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
