i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
The best revenge is premature balding
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize
