Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
