i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Just high enough for therapy.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Randomize