Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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