i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
