i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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