Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
We need to get me chipped asap
Randomize
