For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
only if we run a train.
done.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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