My brain says no but my pants say off.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
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