Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
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