We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
