It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Randomize
