Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
