their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize