And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
