Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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