in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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