She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize