U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
