She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
