when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
