Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
