how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
