My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Randomize
