sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Randomize
