yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
