Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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