Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
