so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
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