Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
