let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
