Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Randomize
