youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
you had me at cake vodka
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
