my mouth tastes like poor choices
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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