just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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