Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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