Will you blow on my dice?
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I have already put on my inside pants.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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