Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
