Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize