Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
