I just pynch a tree in the face
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
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