i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
smell my finger.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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