Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
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