what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
