There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
