i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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