when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize
